It shouldn’t take a marketing genius to figure out how to promote the upcoming Wonka movie. It is the origin story to the most famous chocolate maker in cinematic history, so you’d think that sweet treats would feature heavily in the merchandise cooked up by Warner Bros. ahead of their big holiday season release. However, you’d be very wrong.
Ahead of the film’s December release date, Warner Bros. Discovery have unveiled a whole host of new merchandise tied to the film, yet it is clear something is missing. There are new Funko Pop figurines to pick up, glasses frames branded with the film’s logo, and a blanket with a host of Oompa Loompas silently judging you, but not one chocolate bar in the announcement. The closest thing fans get is a rebranded Kinder Surprise that is only available in Europe and Canada.
Look, we don’t want to tell the marketing department at Warner Bros. how to do their job, but someone in a meeting must have mentioned that maybe giving out Wonka Bars would be a good way to get people excited for their new film. Its not called Willy Wonka and the Sneaker Factory, after all. They’re giving us chocolate colored Converse and a Wonka Bar Christmas tree ornament, so they clearly know what the people want. The fact that we’re getting a Wonka origin story without getting to taste the product that made him famous is a travesty. Heck, they could even pop a few Golden Tickets from the original film into the run to give out prizes.
Listen, we’re not angry about the lack of chocolate bars in the Wonka merchandise announcement – we’re just disappointed and also hungry.
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